Friday, December 31, 2010

On the last day

Looks like I won't be seeing the fireworks this year too. Great. Not that I've ever seen the firework display before. It just seems nice to look at with a group of friends.

So anyways today is a busy day because something-I-can't-mention is happening and is taking place at my house. Meme told me Rasulullah cakap tak baik sebarkan this thing that is gonna happen. Take a guess lol. And tomorrow there will be a big celebration for my Tok Mama who is going to turn 80 this year or something. Dua hari berturut-turut rumah kau penuh orang. Bayangkan Mak jadi neat freak dua hari berturut-turut. Yerghhhh

Today is the last day of 2010 like wtf time flies so fast weh. Some of my friends are freaked out on the prospect of turning 20 because it's such a huge number ._. I think 20 sounds like a sensible, I'm-gonna-get-married-in-five-years age. Lol I hope. But I don't really care about turning twenty. I'm still five on the inside. Hihi. Plus I like being a little older. It makes me feel like very..grown up. And that also means another forever alone year for me. Yay -_-

5 more years till I get married 5 more years baybeeee!

Oh and sudah-sudahla buat new year resolution tu. Bukannya kau berusaha nak mencapai resolution kau pun. Setiap tahun benda sama je dalam list. Buat sebab semua orang buat. Lol cepat betul succumb dekat peer pressure. Dahlah tahun baru bukan Islam pulak tu. Ish ish ish.

So anyways dah 5 tahun berturut-turut aku ada post on the 31st of December :B Haha sukeee.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Rants III

If you were given another chance at life, would you do it differently?

You know, I can't really answer this question. Because there are some parts of me that I love and some that I hate. But the parts that I hate makes the part that I love. I mean, without the parts that I hate doing what they had done, I wouldn't have the parts that I love. It's all one big complicated cycle. But whatever. Nobody gets what I'm trying to say most of the time anyways.

So I was supposed to go to the library today because I'm bored out of my wits because I just feel very alone in this small compartment of mine because I am alone because my roommates went to godknowswhere they were gone by the time I woke up. So here I am in front of the laptop trying to live a life but failing, miserably. I mean, who lives a life in front of a laptop. People go outside and socialize and have fun okay, that's what living a life is all about. I wanted to go to the library to borrow a few books so that I wouldn't be so bored. As nice as it is to have internet here, it would've been nicer to have a broadband as well.

But because I am always fucking broke, I can't afford a broadband. And a couple of other things as well. I hate having to depend on my parents for money I HATE IT. They wouldn't let me work and I hate that too. I'm 19 so I should know how to take care of myself. I have my principals and my beliefs so seriously, they shouldn't be worried about me mixing with the wrong group of people (which is what they were obsessing about whenever I told them I wanted to work) or whatever. I had learned my lesson from before and I'm not stupid enough to do the same mistake twice without any realization that I am doing it.

I am so stressed out that even surfing the nest is pissing me off. I don't know, I'm just not contented yet. With anything. Emotionally, financially, mentally. I'm not happy with myself. And that sucks because I can't remember the last time I was happy with myself and with what I had. People always say that you won't get the things you want but you'll get the ones you need NOW I NEED A FUCKING BROADBAND HOW COME I DON'T HAVE ONE YET HUH. I must be so pissed to have the f-word come out loud in public. My sisters would flip, they always do.

When I say fucking accompanied by an adjective, it's to emphasize the adjective. Not just random cursing. And I find fricking or friggin not satisfactory enough so when I am in the mood and I feel like saying what I want to say, I used fucking instead. Plus I read the paper a few months back saying how they had done research which shows that if you curse when you're in pain, it'll make you feel better. Psychology's weird like that. But it works for me and that is all I care about. And not just physical pain too, I think it works on emotional pain as well. Although I don't really know why am I in pain but saying the f-word followed by 'it all' really does make me feel better.

And don't judge me on the f-word. People have this kind of mentality where everyone who curses are sluts and whores and cheap bitches. I know, I had that kind of mentality before too but I've grown out of it because the level of immaturity didn't fit me very well. I'll be 20 next year so I think I pretty much have the right to say whatever I want to say without judgmental glares or pointing fingers in my face. It's just a part of who I am. The neutral part. Because I don't hate cursing and I absolutely don't like it. It's like a quick getaway for me.

I am so stressed out and pissed off I can't even think straight anymore. I think I'll go listen to my iPod now.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Ze Main Kampus

Wow it must've bee almost two weeks since my last post. So anyways, it's quite nice here in Gombak. Lots of places to eat, ok accomodation (although I do miss being in the same room as my dormmates ._.), and most importantly,  A LOT OF GUYS. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. And I've kind of gotten the hang of where is where and how to get to that where so everything is pretty much okay.

But I'm still not used to walking that good what 200,300m to class? Dekat Nilai the classes are like 3 minutes from my room okay. So yes, although my Mahallah is the nearest one to my Kuliyyah, I still feel that it's a long walk. I'm just relieved that I tak sampai classes panting and gasping for air and being sweaty all over. I mean, people from Mahallah Sumayyah prolly would because their Mahallah is SO BLOODY FAR INSIDE. Most of my dormmates got accommodated there and I had spent a night in Sasa's room so yes, I would know lol.

And I'm taking only about 5 subjects this semester with 13.5 contact hours. People always tell me it's too sikit but I know my limit and how much I can carry so I'd say that 5 subjects are just fine for me. Plus I'm also taking the Halaqah I class and the Library Skill class and on my CRS it looks as if I'm taking 7 subjects lol.

My subjects are; Bahasa Melayu Lanjutan (wtf right kena learn BM all over again. I just hope KOMSAS is not included), Poetry, Linguistics, Intensive Writing and Intro to Mass Com. So far I've met all my lecturer except the one for Lingu because she's supposedly not in yet and classes will commence on the 20th which is next week.

My BM lecturer ROCKS I TELL YOU. He's in his 30s and likes to make faces and doesn't look garang at all. I've only spent an hour with him and I really really like him already :D And so is my poetry lecturer, Kak TJ. I think she's almost in her 40s but she insisted on us calling her Kak TJ WHICH IS REALLY COOL. She's half german so she looks really pretty and of course her english is gilbabs. Seriously, all my lecturer are awesomazing as far as I can tell. I asked a senior of mine from school about the lecturer choices I've made and she said they were all A-okay which is good news because I wouldn't wanna be stuck with somebody I can't really stand for 4 months.

So anyways everything is okay as I see it. Although lunch at Evoke is pretty expensive ._. I've eaten Nasik Bujang like 3 nights in a row now. It's just that, that is the only dish that comes to mine when I think of dinner every night. Plus they only cost me like RM1.80 which is cheap sebab nasik die tarok sumpah banyak gile.

Mee went home just now because she doesn't have to go to some stupid camp because her name didn't pop up during Taaruf Week's SLEU briefing but MY NAME FRICKIN DID. I MEAN, HOW UNFAIR IS THAT? There I was minding my own business while some lady promoted SLEU (it stands for student languange enhancement unit I think) on the stage and suddenly she got to the part where apparently, they had randomly selected 6 people from each kuliyyah for some camp in Port Dickson AND THERE MY NAME WAS, NUMBER 1 AS THE PERSON CHOSEN FROM THE KULIYYAH OF ISLAMIC REVEALED KNOWLEDGE AND HUMAN SCIENCES. How lucky can I get right.

So while everybody gets to go home this week, I have to go to this dumb camp because if not they're gonna send some kind of letter to my Kuliyyah saying whatever. STILL. Urghhhhhhhh. I'm just going because I don't have to pay for it, free food and because it was stated in the contract that they made me sign that there would be 'mixed gender' activites. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Ok tipu I'm not that desperate. But it would be nice to have a few more male acquintances around campus. As of now I only have like what, three? Syafiq, Hasif and budak-budak alamin that I say hi to when we bump into each other. Which makes it 5. Whatever. I suck at making guy friends ok. So sue me.

Ok I think I better stop now because I haven't showered yet. The water here is ICY COLD I swear on cookie crumbs it's like taking s cold shower on the top of Mount Everest. TAK TIPU. Now I know why people don;t shower during winter. CEH HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Ok I'm off to my winter shower. See yeah.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010


Semalam aku tidur rumah abang aku kat Shah Alam. Lin la punye plan ni. Mula-mula aku malas gila cam FFFFUUUUUU nak ikut sebab lagi 2 hari nak pegi Gombak and aku belum pack apa satu haram dahlah bilik semak dahlah almari pun lebih kurang semaknye plus dalam beg peti aku ada baju-baju lama yang aku dah taknak so nak kena fikir pulak nak tarok mana baju-baju tu. Hoh banyak kerja jugak packing ni.

Plus semalam aku pergi Giant nak beli toiletries sebab toiletries memang wajib kena beli DUH. Aku beli sabun Ginvera dengan spa scrub(?) perisa(??) lavender sebab sabun tu adalah sabun paling bes dalam dunia tambah-tambah kalau kau pakai dengan benda spongy-spongy tu macam PERGHH AKULAH MANUSIA YANG PALING BERSIH LAGI SUCI DI DUNIA YANG FANA INI! Serious, tak tipu. Tapi kena pakai dengan spongy-spongy die skali baru rasa bersih. Kalau kau pakai sabun tu ala carte rasa macam tak sabun pun.

Berus gigi pulak (apa ni beli berus gigi ape pon nak cerite) aku beli jenama systema sebab Lin cakap berus die adalah sangat nipis dan boleh masuk sehingga ke urat-urat gigi kau. Aku pun percaye dah beli jelah sebab aku tak pernah pergi jumpa dentist dan lin ada pengalaman memakai braces dan berjumpa dentist setiap bulan jadi mungkin kata-kata lin adalah boleh dipercayai. Tapi aku pelik la aku berus gigi sejak kecik tak pernah tinggal (kecuali masa skolah rendah lol malas gila berus gigi sampai kena pukul dengan mak) kenapa sampai dah umur 19 ni gigi aku tak puth-putih lagi? Aku suka tengok gigi orang yang betul-betul putih tapi mungkin they had veneers on their teeth so, er, nevermind. Aku pernah cuba nak try apa eh yang colgate punye produk tu? Simply White? Aku macam dah nak terconfusekan dengan simplysiti. Hahahahahahha. Tapi lepastu ada kawan aku cakap kalau gigi kuning(mild) tu mungkin sebab genetik. So aku give up.

Lepastu aku juga beli *glances at plastic bag full of toiletries* spongy-spongy, dynamo and a few other things not really worth mentioning here.

Ohh, hari semalamnye pulak aku pergi OU nak cari kasut kelas dengan beg kelas sebab beg polkadot aku macam dah sangat buruk sobs sobs aku sangat sayangkan beg itu. Tapi apakan daya, life must go on. So anyways aku memang dah ada idea kasut apa aku nak sebab Tiyah cakap kat sana nanti mesti banyak berjalan (ke die sorang yang banyak jalan sebab mahallah die jauh dari kuliyyah hahahahagahgaa) so aku macam nak kasut vans yang canvas, lace up deck shoe tu sebab macam ideal gile aku taktau kenape tapi memang macam ideal habis ah.

But then I wasn't sure OU ada ke tak kedai vans sebab aku macam tak pernah nampak pun padahal OU tu aku dah boleh jadi tour guide kot hahahahahh. And the night before aku ada baca blog Kiko ada satu post die ni pasal how bad she wanted this kind of kasut and she mentioned that dekat Cotton On ada and so I went to Cotton On and I bought a grey pair! Mak aku tengok she was like, "Hang nak pakai kasut NI pi keleh?" So I was like, "Mak, mase sekolah dulu Tikah pakai baju kurung dengan kasut ape?" and she went, "Tapi tu mase sekolah fgrejkehrfuewgkerget" I win. Hahahahaha.

Tapi kasut aku macam perempuan sikit kot. And lace die putih so aku nak cari lace hitam supaya tak cepat kotor plus lace putih nampak macam kasut sekolah sangat hegehegehgehge.

Beg pun aku beli kat situ jugak sebab masa tengah cari warna kasut ideal tetibe ternampak beg paling cool yang aku pernah jumpa dan beg tu adalah exactly what I had in mind untuk beg kelas ok the color, the design SEMUANYA SEPERTI YANG AKU MAHUKAN! Jadi aku pun beli. Ish, mesti cool habis aku kat UIA nanti. Mak aku tak cakap banyak bila tengok beg aku she just went, "Beg apa ni?" which made me say "Beg ni in-thing tau mak. It's the IN-THAAANNNGGG." So instead she said, "Toksah dok in-thing in-thing. Blajaq je elok-elok." Mak slalu menamatkan perbualan seperti tu because honestly, who can argue with what's In and what's Out kan hahaagahgag.

Ok yang sebenarnya yang aku ingin tekankan dalam post ni adalah aku tidur rumah abang aku semalam iaitu yang merupakan Lin punye idea. Kitorang sampai rumah abang aku dalam pukul 6 macamtu lepastu abang aku bawak pergi satu tempat charity abenda tah dekat dengan rumah die ni sebab Naqib nak tengok kude wtf. Tempat ni macam agak cool la sebab die cam ade cafe, gym, horse stable (untuk orang yang naik kuda for recreational purposes or nak amek lessons) and yang paling penting sekali ADA TRAMPOLINE SIOT. Cafe die pulak adalah macam sangat cool. Kau makan minom je apa kau nak, and then kau bayar ikut keikhlasan hati kau nak bagi berapa kat charity. Abang aku la cerita ni, aku taktau die tipu ke tak tapi muke die serious je so must be true.

So anyways kitorang pon pergila tempat naik kuda tu sebab naik nak kuda and turns out that die takut nak naik sorang-sorang so aku kesian aku pun temanla die naik kude. Like wtf habis cool aku naik kude FOR RECREATIONAL PURPOSES KALAU NAIK KUDE YANG BERLARI TU NAMPAK COOL AR GAK. Tapi naik dengan budak kan, so takdela nampak loser sangat hahahahaha. Last skali aku naik kude was like 7,8 tahun lepas aku rasa.

 Nazif yang 24/7 tak dapat tangkap ape yang sedang berlaku di persekitarannye.
 "Tikah, nanti hang letak caption gambaq ni abang saye yang hensem tau." -__________-
 Orang pro naik kuda dengan attire yang sangat cool. Sobs.
 Satu stable budak ni nak jalan.
 Muka dendam sebab kena jadi loser naik kuda dengan cara yang tak cool. DAHLAH AKU SORANG KENA PAKAI HELMET SENGAL NI PULAK TU APAHAL NAQIB TAKYAH PAKAI HELMET PON.
 "Ye sabar bang saye belom stable lagi ni lek lu lek lu." Tangan atas peha aku tu tangan Naqib ok. And kurangajar helmet tu ada tulis 'Epic' aku rasa helmet tu nak perli aku. Serious.
 Hek eleh kau dah naik kuda buat muka masam lak AKU TENGAH BERKORBAN COOLNESS AKU KOT NAIK KUDA DENGAN KAU UNGRATEFUL PUNYA BUDAK! Aku pulak yang puas dapat naik kuda wtf.
 Tiyah teringin jugak nak naik kuda.
 Told ya.
 Tiyah lagi lame sebab ade gambar naik kuda dari jauh. Hahahahahahhaahah.
 Bebi yang tak sedar die tengah naik kude -_-
 Gamabr cliche habis 'Keluarga Saya dan Kuda'. Kakak ipar aku suka betul amek gamba camni ._.
 Ni counter kat cafe. Budak pakai spek yang jaga counter ni agak cute jugak. Hihihihihi.
 TRAMPOLINEEEE OMG OMG OMG. Aku rasa untuk budak-budak tapi time nak balik tu aku masuk jugak lompat 2,3 kali HAHAHAGAHGAHGA. Lepastu aku baru lompat sekejap Naqib jadi clumsy or maybe sebab aku berat sangat lalu jatuh and mase tu aku still melompat dengan penuh kegembiraan so either I accidentally jumped on his hand or he accidentally crushed his own damn hands lepastu die menangis lepastu abang aku ajak balik. Like, APA NI AKU TAK PUAS LAGI NAIK TRAMPOLINE.
 Terpaksa ambek gamba sendiri lagi sebab takde orang nak ambekkan. Sigh.
 Jat's attempt to actually smile while his picture is taken. Bravo -_-
 Aku tarok gambar ni sebab Lin selekeh. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA.
 Ok la dah elok sikit.
Nama restoran yang kitorang makan malam tu. Aku nak makan TomYam sebenarnya tapi abang aku nak cepat sebab kitorang nak pergi iCity (tapi tak masuk pun sebab banyak gile kereta wtf plus abang aku kerja harini so macam tak appropriate la kalau balik lambat) so abang aku suruh order ala carte je and aku dah BORING GILA KOT ASYIK NASI GORENG NASI GORENG KAT NILAI MENGADAP NASIK GORENG KAT RUMAH NASIK GORENG KELUAR MAKAN PUN NASIK GORENG GAK MELEBIH AAA KAAAAAAAAAAANNN. Tapi aku terpaksa jugak order sebab sangat lapar ._. Aku order nasik goreng petai campur sotong. Tak sedap ._____________.

So anyways tu jelah aku nak cerita. Pergh dah lama jugak aku tak tulis panjang-panjang macamni. Disebabkan sekarang dah pukul 12.49 which means that it's already 7th of December, OMG ESOK MASUK GOMBAK OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG. Wish me luck :|

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Right. Great.

So I finally discovered what my eczema is called. Eczemas have different species(?) too okay. No, shit I'm making it sound like I have living microbes on my palm. Disturbing.

So anyways, it's the pompholyx eczema. If you love me and you care about me, google it up because the pictures are too graphic to be put on display here :(

HAHA like I care. Well, I do really but the pictures aren't THAT graphic so it would be okay to put it up here. Heck, I've had a picture of poop up on here before, why not an eczema-infested hand?

Ok I seriously need to stop making my hand sound disturbing.

Remember I had this picture up in my eczema post before and joked about how my hand looked like this? Well, this is it. This is a severe case of the pompholyx eczema. Stupid, backstabbing joke. When you have this kind of eczema, you'll get blisters all over your hand and it'll hurt so bad that you won't be able to do anything with the infected hand. Tiyah had a fever a few days ago and when she recovered, blisters started sprouting(?) on her right hand. Her fingers look like the ones in this picture I KID YOU NOT. She even took a picture of it and I wanted to post it on here but she wouldn't allow me because it was too creepy :B So anyways my mom sort of freaked out and took her to see a doctor (mom rarely does that, TRUST ME) and she was given two courses of medicine. It's like you have to complete the first course of medicine before moving on the next. And not forgetting being aware of what you mustn't it so the blisters wouldn't come again.

Takboleh makan terung. sambal belacan, udang, sotong wtf wtf wtf udang dengan sotong takleh wtffffffff. But anyways, I'd say that I'm having a pretty minor case of pompholyx eczema because I only have a few blisters on my fingers and only one on my feet (yes, they can grow on your tapak kaki too) so I'm kind of limping everywhere right now because I can't let that stupid blister touch the floor or it would hurt. And my hands aren't infected that bad so I can still type. Tyah typed with one hand for like 3 days because the blisters won't go away. And she had to ask me to kupas her ikan and ayam for her masa makan please she can't eat using her hand. It was scary ._.

But mine is only a minor case so I'm still going to gobble down as much seafood and terung and belacan as I can because who knows, maybe one day my hand is going to resemble that creepy hand in the picture and all I can eat is porridge. HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.

I honestly hope that day wouldn't come.

Today, when I realized that I have the same type of eczema as my sister, I got a bit worried because I kept thinking what would happen it if got worse. I mean, WHO WOULD WANNA GET MARRIED TO A GIRL WITH A HANDFULL OF BLISTERS? HAHA LITERALLY HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

But seriously. How am I supposed to cook, siang ikan, siang ayam (dear husband I hope you hate chicken),basuh sayur, bagi mandi anak WHEN I HAVE BLISTERS ON MY HAND ARRRGGGHHHH, Nobody's gonna want to be married to me. I'm gonna be forever alone. From the moment I saw that meme I KNEW it was trying to tell me something. This is such a tragic turn of events for me. I think I'm going to drown my sorrows in a rerun of the vampire diaries. Goodbye.