think

aku rasa sejak aku mula kerja ni pengurusan diri aku jadi tak tentu arah.dekat kerja tak payah cakaplah.kadang-kadang lunchtime banyak customer aku tak makan pun.balik rumah lagila tak heran.selalu aku balik makan coklat sikit aku dah kenyang.by the time aku balik pun dah pukul 630.so confirmlah malam aku tak makan.

selalunya aku balik aku tak mandi pun.termasuk hari ni dah dekat seminggu aku mandi sehari sekali.aku tahu.jengkel gila.tapi kalau kau letih macamni kau pasti rasa nk angkat kening pun kau tak larat.

jadual harian aku bila dah sampai rumah:

0630:sampai rumah,cium naqib,buat naqib nangis,mak marah sebab buat naqib nangis,lari dari mak dan naqib.
0700:masuk bilik,guling-guling atas katil,tukar baju tidur.ramai-ramai kata eee.*ramai-ramai:EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.*
0715:online,baca blog anak mat nor dan magenta.bukak myspace sebab tak tahu nak buat apa lagi di alam maya ni.
0800:masok bilik,tidoooooooo.
1030:bangon,turun bawah,bukak peti ais cari coklat.makan dua bar.konon-konon kenyang,naik atas,online kat laptop meme sambil tengok movie kat hallmark/starmovie.
1230:dengar ayah bangun dari recliner tanda dia nak bukak pintu and tengok aku dah tidur ke belum.menggelabah 3 saat.snap the laptop shut,tutup tv sambil menjengketkan kaki dan masuk bilik.
1245:dengar flyfm.ikut sama nyanyi.kena marah dengan meme sebab bising.marah dia balik.senyap.
0200:tido for real.

ya hidup aku memang bosan.

im in a stage of life in which i tengok seorang lelaki panas dengan muka dan hati yang tiada perasaan.

usually when i see hot guys ah,ill go,"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH.HENSEM GILA OMGWTFBBQ." *hyperventilates extremely and drops dead in front of hot dude*

but now when i saw any hot guy ill just go,"oh.a guy."

WATISHAPPENINGTOMEHH?

am i turning gay?

if i am,

LEE TIS IS YOUR BLADI FAULT FOR GETTING ME INVOLVED IN TAT GAGUY ORGANISATION.

aaaaahhhh i wanna be straight again!no i havent really turned gay so im still still straight.in that case,i should rearrange my sentence to,"I WANNAH BE STRAIGHT FOREVAAHHH."

in a name.

i watched 'anak halal' on astro ria the other day.u know,the one thts got farid kamil,maya karin and fasha sandha innit?

no?

okay.

but ima tell u anyways.its got farid kamil,maya karin and fasha sandha innit.now you know.haha haha.(bladi lame joke)fasha sandha as always lah,kangkang sane,kangkang sini.bukak sane bukak sini.dan sungguh banyak adegan peluknya dengan lelaki bukan muhrim spt farid kamil,jehan miskin dan banyak lagi.in tht movie she plays a poor little rich girl who lives in a bapakglebatakbesatakbolebla punya bungalow.and anak dato,macam cerita melayu biasalah.she was also,a drug addict.and she was friends with farid kamil,maya karin,asyraf muslim and a few other ppl who look familiar but i dono who.her father callls them 'budak-budak yang telah menjatuhkan moral anak saya'.haha.anak kau memang dah pakai hancur keluar nak salahkan orang.cehh mulut laser.warisan anak sulung ghazali.clap clap.

so my main point cerita this story bukannya nk promote.its because in 'anak halal',fasha sandha plays a character named atikah.yes ppl,ATIKAH.

MY NAME.

MY BLADI NAME.

(wtf cover blowed.so i dont have to use aika anymore after this lmao.no wait ill still be using it)

do you know how weird if feel like when farid kamil runs around and yells,"ATIKAAAHHH!ATIKAAAAHHH!TKAAAA!"

I MAHU MATI KALAU DIA PANGGIL NAMA I LAGI SEKALI.

farid kamil:ATIKAHHHHHHHHHHH!

*faints and dies*

and maya karin so casually calling her tka.it's like im in the movie.WOOOH O.O
and sebab itu i tak tengok sampai habis.sebab i geli gelemen dengan atikah si penagih dadah yang pakai baju tali terlondeh macam baru kena rogol dengn fauzi suami lisdawati yang macam pervert jahanam dalam movie tu.waw banyaknya censored words.maaf saya memang begini bila mendaki gunung emosi.

tapi saya sungguh bangga kerana farid kamil panggil(JERIT) nama saya di kaca tv.

terima kasih farid kamil.you made my day.

note to self:macam ko sorg je name atikah dalam dunie ni.hahaha.

nyek de nyek

kicking the baku-ness aside.

haifa and i have been planning.oh in case u didnt know,she's my workmate.both of us are 17 so yeah we met and clicked just like that.i met her a few days ago and already we're like eternal bestfriends lmao.see how fast i can be friends with unknown ppl?HEH HEH.

so since our pay was the same and both of us wanted to do OT(overtime) for 4 times every month,we figured that we'd resign in may because we wanna spend the rest of june pampering ourselves with the pay.BE JEALOUS.muahahahaha*refer to rico's laugh*

so we started having this crazy idea that we'd follow a tour group(bikin senang) and travel.i mean REALLY TRAVEL.we looked up hong kong disneyland's package,an indonesian shopping spree package and a muslim tour of beijing package.watt they're really cheap and affordable okayy.and i hope my passport is still valid so i dont have to spend rm300 on it hoh.haha padan muka kau haifa kena buat pasport baru :P

i realleh want to goo.we've put aside 1000 for visa passport tickets etc and 1500 for shopping.HOOOOOOOOTS.so that leaves us another 1500 to sambung shop in malaysia lah..waa sukanya!

tadi i sort of joked to mummy and daddy(THEY WERE ACTUALLY LISTENING TO WHAT I WAS SAYING.WOOOHH) about this thing and i was really surprised that they were sort of okay with it.usually mummy ah,even when i joke she would say,"DONT.EVEN.BLADI.THINK.ABOUT.IT" but i was like joking tadi kan.so taktahulah if i asked for real she would permit me or not.i think daddy would tho.but well,yeah.

so bila i sudah kumpul my money ill ask them again.for real.hoh kini i sudah berdebar macam gila.mengapa harus post begini ah.

ok babai.

itch

saya tidak pernah beritahu sesiapa tentang perkara ini.kerana saya rasa ia keanak-anakan dan menjukkan belah(side?) saya yang sungguh tidak matang.wah mengapa ayat ini berbunyi aneh.tidak mengapalah.

sebenarnya,hmm.saya masih segan lagi nak beritahu.tapi tak apa.saya akan kumpulkan semangat juang saya dan beritahu juga.

saya cemburu tengok naqib.semasa naqib lahir memang ramai orang telah menduga bahawa saya akan merasa perasaan itu kerana setelah 15 tahun menjadi anggota keluarga yang terkecil akan ada pula yang mengatasi kekecilan saya.2 tahun lalu,saya tidak rasa apa-apa lagi.tapi sejak kebelakangan ini,saya rasa seperti seorang invalid.ini kerana mummy dan daddy sentiasa memberi dia sahaja segala perhatian mereka.bila saya sedang berkata-kata dengan mereka dan tiba-tiba naqib berkata sesuatu yang dianggap cerdik dan comel secara automatik semua orang akan memandang dia walaupun apa yang saya perkatakan itu adalah berkenaan dengan urusan hidup mati saya.saya rasa tersisih dan terbuang.ya saya tahu,pathetic nak gado dengan budak kecil.tapi saya tak boleh kata tak.mesti ya juga.

kadang-kadang saya sengaja cubit dia atau jentik tangan dia dengan extra kuat ketika dia membuat kesalahan untuk membalas dendam diatas fenomena semua-orang-tak-kisah-dengan-saya ini.saya tak suka dioutcast oleh mummy dan daddy sendiri seperti ini.tidak saya bukan abuser.menghukum seorang budak 3 tahun yang membaling handphone anda yang bari dibeli pada kadar kelajuan dewa di atas lantai konkrit adalah satu perkara yang mesti dilakukan.

saya masih ingat lagi.masa saya kecil dulu.daddy selalu pulang dari kerja dan saya akan main-main tolong tanggal stokinnya dan duduk mengadu dengan dia tentang budak-budak yang mengejek kehitaman saya di sekolah.saya rindu saat-saat itu.meskipun saya tahu hodoh benar pemandangannya jika saya duduk mengadu dengan dia lagi walaupun dah besar macam tungkai panjang ini.saya rindu keadaan sewaktu saya kecil-kecil dahulu.semasa saya yang bongsu.walaupun saya masih bongsu sekarang,saya masih rasa cemburu pada naqib kerana merampas takhta kebongsuan saya.

ya saya memang gembira ada anak saudara comel yang berusia 3 tahun.dan lagi seorang on the way pula itu.hmm nampaknya usia 18 tahun langsung tidak mematangkan saya dari segi apa pun.saya masih saya yang dulu.bodoh,gedik dan manja.*muntah hijau*

kalau saya boleh pinjam mesin masa dari filem back to the future itu kan best.sigh

p/s:saya bukan seorang child abuser.

hem

i felt sorry for syawal.because his brother died a few days earlier.and he was just about to start his last year of school.and i feel like an insensitive bitch when i suddenly blurted,"how did your brother die?".

maybe he was having a hard time coping with it and im directly being so insensitive and stupid.i have a thing about funerals.i mean,when people whom i may have known directly or indirectly dies.its like,my world suddenly goes dark for a while.and i pun jadi sober and moody semacam.its just that,knowing that they're dead and im still alive.its..oh bladihell its so hard to explain.

al-fatihah to mohd zaliff bin zainal.i hope u stay strong syawal.and study hard this year and get as many a's u can grasp.im sure your brother would have wanted the same too.and learn to be an awesomazing guitarist like he did lol.im sure he would have been proud of you.altho we hadnt been close just know that i'll always be ur friend ok?altho i know ud prefer jazelia a million times more HEH HEH.

oh and a few last words,
goodluck in your spm ok.altho i know its still months ahead of you but it doesnt hurt to be prepared early.early birds get the worm!(xde kaetan) so kickstart this year with ur kickass saya-mhu-berjaya spirit yo!i know you can do it :D

GOOOO SYAWAAALLLLLL!
hoot-hoot!

payssss

woot-woot.
curi tulis blog time kerja.
contohilah saya :D

so im at work rite now.and im blogging bcause nobody else is in the office hehehe.so since im bloggin at work might as well talk about work.or pay to be exact.hooots.lagi satu bulan i dapat my pay!(mcm shari due je)

and im setting a target for my january pay.since my basic salary is rm800 and everytime i work overtime i got rm50,im planning to have 4 overtimes this month so i can up my salary to(yes ppl)rm1000.one thousand bucks.one thousand ringgit.one thousand quid.one thousangg bebeh.4 figured.like WOAH.ive never THAT much money before.so thts why lah im super-batak ed over my pay and thus i intent to capai my target!*skips around*

list of MUST BUY things:
1.cute tops.*hyperventilates BIGTIME*
2.jeans.i want tat grey jeans i saw in forever21(!!)
3.and ipod nano.(collect dari yang paling kecil ya!)
4.a handbag/handbagS.
5.shoes shoes and lots of em.
6.a pair of roxy flipflops.*in important politician voice*"i go for the best qualities only"HEEEHHHH


and ill sambung laterr lah.i heard a tingtong.must be one of those cerewet cus
tata.