Ever had one of those feelings when you're just stresses about nothing. Really, you don't know what's getting you all worked up. But you do know that it does. And then the constant headaches came, most of them when you see someone living a life you'd kill to live. Or am I the only one experiencing that? Sigh.
No matter how well off you are, you'll never get satisfied. You'll always be wanting more and more and more. Money, clothes, up-to-date gadgets. I hate it that I don't get a monthly allowance thus my always-broke status. But I am aware that there are more unfortunate people that me. I know that someone somewhere probably works as a rubber tapper or something to get like RM5 a day and yet I'm complaining about not receiving a monthly allowance.
I know. But I'm still making a big fuss out of it because I've never been there. I've never been a rubber tapper who works hard everyday just to earn RM5. All my life I can say that I was well fed and I was never short of clothes to wear. Or do I get special help from the government or something like that. I was okay. We were okay. A nice, cosy two story terrace with 7 people living in it had been my home up until I was 15. I never slept on the streets. I never had to beg for money or food. Whenever I asked for money from my parents they complied.
Heck, I was put to study in a private school until I was 16. My family is, what I can say, well off. When I was 17 we moved from our old house into a new 2 and a half Semi D because my brother got married and had kids. And all of us are grown up now so our old house felt a bit crumpy with all 9 of us in it back then.
I don't really know why am I writing this. But this is the main purpose of a blog right? To write your heart out. The awkward part is that people can read it. Sort of like having people your diary. But it's not like everyday I write sappy things like this. Only once in a while. So I don't really mind people reading it really. Read all you want. Really :)
Yeah and about this undefined feeling that I usually felt, I guess there's really nothing I can do about it. Being thankful for the life that I'm living may work. But whether the inner comfort lasts, I wouldn't really know.
Oh and one more thing. You know how sometimes there are two distinctly different personalities inhibiting your body? I think I got more than 50 of them.